she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
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