Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
ha. weirdest feeling ever. just wiped my ass with my non-dominant hand. (eating cheeseburger with right one)
Your grandmother is in heaven weeping.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
