he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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