so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
I looked at my own cervix.
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
