There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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