I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
Randomize
