Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
Randomize
