Sry I called you an 8
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Randomize
