I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Randomize
