can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
Randomize
