Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
