I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
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