I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
you traded sex for a burrito?
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
