she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Randomize