17 year olds will be the death of me.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Randomize