he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
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