You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
