But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
