I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Randomize