Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
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