Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
can u get pink eye on your cock?
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
Randomize