Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
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