you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
Randomize
