i can't believe i had my finger in that
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
Randomize
