I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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