I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
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