he kept farting in my kitchen and blaming it on the dog. then we went to wendy's and he spent twenty minutes in the bathroom. im pretty sure he shit his pants.
you should have known when you found out he drove a mini cooper not to hang out with him.
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize