Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
Randomize
