the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
I touched a dick in church today
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
Randomize
