she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
