White coat. Heels.
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Randomize
