Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
Randomize
