It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
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