Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize