The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
Randomize
