I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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