I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
Randomize
