she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
I just want nice things and good sex
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
Randomize
