His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
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