we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
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