this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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