I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
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