doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
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