can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
Acid is not a monday night drug
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
Randomize