At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize