It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Randomize
