stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Randomize
