Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
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