So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
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