I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
