butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Randomize
