my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
